I have a friend who says he can’t cry — are there medical conditions that stop people from crying?

- asks Rose Kelly

By | Posted April 16, 2007
Posted in: Ever Wondered?, Health
Tags: , , ,

From a badly stubbed toe to teenage angst, there are many instances that make people cry. Yet for some – no matter how charged the situation – shedding tears is impossible.

Strong emotions cause our brains to release chemicals that indirectly lead to teary eyes. A flow of tears not only shoots up the level of endorphins, natural chemicals within the body, providing a sense of well-being and relieving stress, but also they release toxins — making us healthier, according to Dr. William Frey II, a neurologist at the University of Minnesota.

Since the physical act of crying is rooted in the psychological, depression – usually a disease associated with tears – can prevent them. According to a review article published this year in the journal Acta Psychiatrica Scandinavica, severe cases of depression flatten emotions, leaving a person without the trigger that starts the crying circuit. Max Hamilton, who created a depression scale in 1960, commented in a 1967 paper that severely depressed patients “go beyond weeping” and settle into a cry-proof state.

The battle against depression can itself snatch away the urge to let it out. In a 2002 study, Adam Opbroek discovered that many patients with sexual dysfunction associated with prescribed anti-depressants also experienced a “diminution in emotional responsiveness.” Medication intended to reduce a sense of sadness, Opbroek found, did so but at the cost of “emotional blunting,” or the same flattening of emotion felt by some depressed patients.

Aside from a numbing form of depression, the inability to cry may be caused by a rare affliction called Familial Dysautonomia (FD), or Riley-Day Syndrome. While someone with FD experiences emotions like anyone else, they’re born without the reflex necessary to produce tears: crying becomes a dry display, according to the foundation’s website.

The inability to feel physical pain is another genetic anomaly that can make a person less likely to cry. With an underdeveloped system of nerves for sensing injury, people with Congenital Insensitivity to Pain with Anhidrosis (CIPA) have a pain threshold high enough to make a bike accident feel more like a pillow fight, and so tears flow less often.

Crying is a uniquely human trait. The situations that make us cry are often the ones we remember most. It shows we are sensitive to things we encounter in our lives and, in that way, it is important for survival. Spilling tears is something we all need to stay healthy.

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  1. Sometimes I can cry, and others, I can’t. Like after I’ve been crying and things get worst, the water works stop and I can’t even form tears in my eyes.

    Does that mean I’m severly depressed or something?

    I’ve been on anit-depressants before, but can that happen? I cry and then just stop.

    Marissa Delgado, May 24, 2007 at 6:43 pm
  2. my husband experienced a traumatic brain injury in an auto accident that left him in a 2 week coma and months of rehabilitation. He cannot cry, not matter how badly he wants to. He was able to cry prior to the accident. His neurologist thinks it’s PTSD, is that the most likely reason? he is not depressed…

    Susan McIntosh, August 21, 2007 at 11:18 pm
  3. i used to cry but now it’s impossible. i like to cry and i wish i can be back a normal person.

    nai, May 4, 2008 at 11:11 am
  4. When I’m really sad I can’t cry it out. I develop a lump in my throat and my eyes water but no tears run. Is that normal? It’s weird because I was one of those people who couldn’t control their tears.

    nai, May 4, 2008 at 11:25 am
  5. My mother in law lost her huband of 61 years and has yet to cry two years later. She feels a lump in her throat and tighness in her chest but cannot cry. I noticed my husband and sister-in-law only shed a couple of tears, is this heriditary?

    Susan Paul, June 25, 2008 at 6:16 pm
  6. I suffered a truamatic brain injury in 1996 was in a coma for several days spent 4 months in the hospital and 8 more to recovery at home. Since then, I have not shed a tear even if I feel the emotion in my heart and need to cry. I am not depressed and do not have PTSD since my car accident has been so long. It is very troubling but have not talked to my Dr as I already deal with residual effects such as ADHD and a learning disorder.

    Laurie, July 6, 2008 at 11:12 pm
  7. Listen, I only checked this stuff out cause my wife says that i am not normal. let me tell you that I haven’t shed a tear since I was 12 years of age. I am now 27. I only cryed then cause i didn’t want to go back to a bording school that shall remain nameless. It was a tuff school which dischsarged us only at the end of the month. My father who I was really close to recently passed and my wife thought that something would come from this and nothing has.

    I am not depressed, feel normal and take lifes lessons to my small construction company.

    Don’t let people say that not crying is not normal. It just means that you have lived life, and that there are other things bigger than break ups and deaths. Everything has a begining and an end. Peoople that dont cry tend to know this.

    Wether it be your dog, car or esspresso machine, everything breaks, so will our sun one day.

    So maybe cry babies are the ones that arent normal as they haven’t realised this simple fact of life yet.


    non cryer, August 27, 2008 at 11:05 pm
  8. I’m only 15 years old, I don’t suffer from depression as far as I know and I don’t think I have experienced any major traumas that could cause PTSD. If anyone on this website can help or knows anyone who can help me understand why I physically can’t cry then could you please post information on this website because I all I want is to be a normal teenager who experiences normal emotions and who can deal with them by letting out a tear. EVERYONE SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO CRY.

    Abi, August 31, 2008 at 6:11 pm
  9. Im 15 as well and no matter what I do i can’t cry , I broke my foot no tears came out , when people I love die I cannot shed one tear ,my gf broke up with me and I loved her alot,but could not cry,is there something wrong with me or was it the way i was rasied.

    Nick, September 11, 2008 at 4:10 pm
  10. This is really interesting! I am really glad I can cry!But I dont like others seeing me cry. I am really sorry to those of you who can’t cry. It must be very furiating.

    Lisa, December 27, 2008 at 1:16 am
  11. My husband also cannot cry. He is 27 and has not cried since he was 24. The weird thing is he used to cry ALL the time. Every fight, sad movies, all the time and several times a week. Now it has been 3 years and he just doesnt cry. I wish he would though.

    Allie, January 1, 2009 at 12:27 pm
  12. I havent cried for 4 years. And no matter what shit happens I just cant cry anymore. I went through a phrase prior to this 4 years of dry spell where I used to cry everyday. The tears were so uncontrollable they just flowed out whenever i feel sad. they were so hard to control. Then after that, I just stopped crying altogether. No matter how hurt or sad I was, all i can feel is a tightness in my chest. Nothing more.

    mick, January 28, 2009 at 2:28 pm
  13. For quite long, I’ve been crying almost everyday. When I wake up and when I go to sleep or sometimes even after lunch (personal reasons)

    I don’t think I’m depressed or anything… That time I prayed to God that I want to stop crying. Now that He granted my wish, I couldn’t help but feel different. I cry when someone insults me, or when someone dies, when I feel pity, or when I watch dramatic endings. Its just funny that I can’t. Maybe some physical condition caused this but I couldn’t point out what.

    My heart is really clenching so bad with a story that I’m currently reading. My eyes burn and I can barely breathe, but I can’t cry.

    Jessica, February 28, 2009 at 3:26 am
  14. I haven’t cried over anything in just under nine years. Not sure if it’s due to depression or a mental block placed upon myself for seeing crying as a weakness. I do wonder about it though, and wonder why it is that no matter how bad things get, who dies, or whatever, I can’t shed one tear.

    Andrew, March 4, 2009 at 1:42 am
  15. I had the most difficult time crying after my son was killed. Yet, when I would go to this very kind dentist for a simple exam (painless)…I would be weeping. I cry at inappropriate times and only certain people seem to cause me to be able to cry.
    Its a horrible tense *feeling* not being able to cry.
    Whenever I am able to shed just a few tears,its a wonderful feeling of relief and relaxation that all the tranquilizers in the world just cannot duplicate. I hope you can help people like all of us who have such difficulty crying. I am certain we will live longer &more happily, too.

    Jean Smythe, March 4, 2009 at 9:20 pm
  16. i used to be extremely depressed and cried more than once every day… my parents were big drug addicts and unlike my other family members who didnt want to get involved i did. tho i no i shoudnt have i always opposed their drug use and would scream at the top of my lungs and swear at them… i called the cops and dcfs on them (they didnt do much infact yelled at me) but as i did this my dad would act abusivley towards me thus i became depressed and after my dad hurt me so bad it made a scar i cried like no other i screamed tears but after that never did i cry again… later my dad samshed me against the door in the closet all i did was louagh… i am an extremely cold person i think terrible thoughts like wishing death on my mother because then i would inherit everything i try to control my thoughts but its really hard and i donnt want to think like that but i really cant help it…. well anyway i dont cry anymore because i think i have had my share of pain and tears so i guess i dont need to cry anymore nothing is painful enough for me to waist m time and mope nothing is that special to me anymore… kinda sad isnt it… even my own brothers death i didnt even get sad hhmmpphh

    alexis, April 26, 2009 at 2:16 am
  17. I have not been able to cry for over 5 years. Am 62 years old. Separated about 5 years ago from husband of 40 years. Divorced 2 years ago-could not cry then or at deaths in the family or any other loss. I feel that I want to cry, that it would make me feel better. May get a little misty but cannot break down and have a good cry. Doctors and even a psychiatrist don’t seem to think it’s a problem, but I do. This is the first place I have seen other people have the exact same problem and possible reasons. I take anti-depressants and they seem to help somewhat.

    sue, June 12, 2009 at 10:37 pm
  18. I was on here to see why my co-worker doesn’t cry, then I read Alexis’s post. I’m so very sorry that nobody helped you. I’m sorry that it broke you. I hope you can find healing. You were only trying to do the right thing. I pray you find your joy again.

    Debbie, July 5, 2009 at 10:44 am
  19. hey okay so i havent been able to cry in forever! i used to take medicine for depression and im so afraid that it has enabled me to cry. i took the medicine becuase my father abused me emotionally and physically and i havent cryed ever since ive seen him which was two years ago. well ok thats not entirly true. i can only cry when i see things about abuse.. ANYWAYS so i was watching this commercial and supposidly there are eye drops that can trigger the chemicals in your brain to make you cry. but just ask your eye doctor.. there is still hope!

    anonymous, August 5, 2009 at 8:41 pm
  20. “Strong emotions cause our brains to release chemicals that indirectly lead to teary eyes.”

    Is there not a part of the brain that can be damaged when someone can’t cry? For example, maybe the chemical-releasing part of the brain that causes tearing when you feel a strong emotion can be releasing the chemicals/hormones/neurotransmitters at the wrong times or not at all. I find this likely for those who do not have depression or Post-traumatic Stress Disorder.

    For those who do or used to have a stronger degree of Depression, it’s like Diabetes. When you have an onset of diabetes (after birth) or as an adult)the insulin receptors/releasers in the body are damaged because you probably had too much sugar and your pancreas stopped being able to filter sugar properly. For depression or any emotional disorder, the inability to cry and crying at the wrong times may come from having cried too much which may have caused the receptors/releasers in the brain to be damaged just like in Diabetes.

    (Sorry if I’m contradicting myself or make no sense or am giving the wrong info; please correct me)

    For those who think that you don’t have depression and feel that you just do not have the reasons to cry because you know “that you have lived life, and that there are other things bigger than break ups and deaths,” you might actually be desensitized to emotion and are not interested in things much/don’t feel things like most people (apparently) do. You can still be happy and might be content with how you feel now, but you might remember that earlier in life, you either felt really bad and, at that point, decided that you never needed to cry again or, you never actually cried.

    I say all of this because, like all things that happen to people, it’s either psychological or physical.

    I hope you all can get some sort of help because even if it does look pathetic, crying is the best thing one can do to renew one’s spirit and energy, and clear one’s mind in order to make good decisions.

    Good luck to all!

    Tania, August 16, 2009 at 1:49 pm
  21. Hi,

    Learning more about depression has opened my eyes to a few things. From the mouth of people who have clinical depression and accept it, they have said that depression is not a constant state of sadness but instead, a state of not being able to feel anything at all.

    Remember that being depressed does not always mean that something so bad happened to you that you are always sad. It also means that there may be a chemical imbalance in your brain and problems just add to it. Also, having problems and realizing that you can’t feel anything or can’t cry when you probably should be can be devastating, adding more to the depression. (I bet you can see the vicious cycle here)

    Tania, September 8, 2009 at 11:38 pm
  22. I came here looking for some advice, regarding a person I know who is now incapable of crying. I have noted that this person, close to me, is now capable of other things instead. Has become self absorbed, uncaring of how others feel, uses people for what this person can get from them…ect..
    I was reading the comments and the one comment that struck me as to where my friend is heading is, unfortunelty, non cryer, August 27, 2008 at 11:05 pm. The person who signed as Non Cryer, appears to be almost superior in his lack of emotional output. This strikes one as a person who cared very deeply at one time for people, places and perhaps social issues, only to lose hope in all mentioned, thus taking a shelter in not allowing feelings to be manifested. Its a shame.
    The other point that I am writing about, is the article where it is stated that crying is a uniquely human trait. This is catagorically untrue. Animals do cry. So do mammals. Elephants cry, for example, when people beat them and when their loved ones die. Koalas exhibit tears, as do horses, as do cats actually. And Ive seen dogs cry. In my years as a child and animal advocate, I have seen all spieces exhibit deep sorrow, I have seen a young loin die of a broken heart, despite all our efforts to save him, once his mate was shot by a hunter. I have seen wolves literally die of starvation when their mate is caught in a barbaric animal trap and instead of eating, laid there next to their mate and died along with their mate. I have seen bears cry, I have seen cows and calves suffer such pain and intense heart break when at rodeos that it would make you be ashamed to be a human being.
    I have seen children, cared for them, tried to help them adjust to the horrific thingstheir parents did to them, cry in such a way that I would think “this is the sound that angels make when they weep.”
    So in closing, I’d like to say, that tears are an important function of a well adjusted life form, but that said, just because tyou cant see a life form crying does not mean that they are not. As my Grandmother once told me “Just beacause you cannot see a tree crying when it is being chopped down, does not mean that the tree is not.”
    So to the gentleman that wrote in on, August 27, 2008, Non Cryer, I hope one day you will allow those close to you the honour of comforting you and may you find the peace and freedom and trust you search for, to allow yourself to cry on the outside instead of solely on the inside.

    Marla, December 7, 2009 at 9:41 pm
  23. I was depressed often until I suffered with a psychotic episode.I was put on drugs abilify to be exact.I took them for 5 months.Now that I am off them for 2 months I have not been able to cry.I actually show more emotions of anger now than sorrow.I think it could be the drugs that caused it,I do notice that everytime I want to cry I get a strong headache and that just distracts me from crying.I am pretty sad I dont feel like the same person I feel like I have changed.Like Marla describes her friend.Now that I dont cry I changed my mind of things for one I care less about people less attached.Because when I did cry I cried because I was attached or what some would could call love.Now I love them but I realize that when I was a weeping harlot I was hurting myself.Now I dont cry and dont feel abused,when I did cry it was because I felt so.I pretty much dont mind for people anymore after being hurt repeatedly.I hope them well but I just get emotionally attached or help them out in something,they can find it elsewhere like I did when I wept.So now I feel there is two of me that constantly fight,but the weeping me gives me a headache so when I want to cry or about to feel pity for myself I get a strong headache like a tension headache.Like I said before I can get angry but not cry,certain situations lately would be ones I would cry about and consider suicide cuz I was depressed but I dont feel that no longer,I actually think justice should be made and the other person be punished and die rather than myself.So yes I do have hope for myself as for others who do me wrong I wish them death.Not something I see as bad,the way I see it is they need to die before they change.

    Me, January 19, 2010 at 8:38 am
  24. I’m 18 and simply can not remember the last time that I cried. It makes me wonder if I am broken. Something in me broke when I was younger and I just stopped crying. I don’t think that I am depressed and there no significant truama in my past. I still feel emotions, probably the same as everyone else although i’ll never know, but I can’t cry. I want to.

    Broken, January 27, 2010 at 1:32 pm
  25. Dear Broken,
    Sometimes at night I find myself asking the same question; what is wrong with me? I haven’t cried since the war. I think I might be a robot; my doctor says I have Chronic Dry Eye, but I am not convinced. Try watching the Notebook or Love Actually. If you can’t cry you may or may not be human.

    Your Friend with Dry Eyes

    DryEyeantorno, February 18, 2010 at 12:58 am
  26. Four months ago I stopped crying. I feel the response starting as well as a very strong need to cry, but it is abruptly cut short. I have Lyme Disease and started a new herbal protocol around that time. The herbs immediately lifted a cloud of depression I was living under. I don’t know if somehow they are preventing me from crying.

    Yesterday, in the middle of Tai Chi class, I started crying and then last night again a brief episode. Can I now cry again? I don’t know.

    Susan, February 25, 2010 at 5:31 pm
  27. hey um well… im not sure if its normal but i havent cried for i think five months. I was taught that tears are weakness. i dont show much emotion, im not an emotional person. there are times when i want to cry and i force myself to remeber all the bad things ive been through and the new problem thats making it worse but i cant. my eyes dont water. and lately ive been feeling numb, i dotn feel happy when something goes right and i dont feel sad anymore. i feel nothing and it bugs me that i cant feel anything.

    lisa, March 21, 2010 at 2:42 pm
  28. Some people just don’t cry, I think it’s kind of wrong for people to expect everyone to express their emotions in the same way, for people who are wondering if there is something wrong with you becuase you don’t cry, there is only something wrong with you if this is a sudden developement and isn’t normal for you.
    This may not be ‘normal’ for the rest of the population but if it’s normal for you it’s fine.

    I really can go years without crying, it’s not like I force myself not to, I just never get the urge to.
    If I ever cry it’s becuase there is something VERY wrong with me.
    I will not take anyone telling me there is something wrong with me because I cry so little, you shouldn’t either.

    Mysti, April 4, 2010 at 7:22 am
  29. I since I have no reason mourn achievement. Sometimes with a terrible desire to do so, but I can not. When a feeling comes over me and I come from the desire to mourn, my eyes fill with tears, but even if I do not go sfuerce. I can not mourn, why is that?

    Ivani, May 31, 2010 at 6:05 pm
  30. I don’t want to sound like a hard ass but I have never cried ever. I through tantrums when i was little, but i have never shed one tear. I’m 20 years old. Good thing i’m a marine right

    Aaorn, June 12, 2010 at 4:30 am
  31. I havnt cried since I was in the 4th grade when my my mother died.
    I am now 30. i havnt cried since, not even when my wife died at my age of 25.

    Kendrick Smith, June 17, 2010 at 6:59 pm
  32. Lol it’s really funny how some “men” who are older than 20 years and still want to cry :D , in my book a man should stop crying after the age of 12.

    Stark, July 26, 2010 at 10:31 pm
  33. i haven’t been able to cry at anything since being born ive been told despite broken bone dad plus outher members of the family dying yet on freak occasions when ive had a drink of alcohol i cry does somebody care to explain please

    liam, September 5, 2010 at 9:03 pm
  34. I can cry for hours on end but only if no one can see me do it. I’m not sure what this means but i would like some form of answer because it worries alot of people. please help?

    If you can help me in any way feel free to find my on myspace or facebook.

    Richelle Spiak, October 12, 2010 at 7:41 pm
  35. Hi, im 16 and ive always been known to cry easily yet lately i can’t. even though i so much want to. and i feel that my chest is tightening everyday. is it because of the stress im getting from a huge and important exam that is coming up? i used to feel much better after a good cry.

    AMY, October 15, 2010 at 10:08 am
  36. This is brilliant reading. I am 29 and cry often, at different things, happy and sad. From reading these pages I now understand it is because I have very high emotions in my body that come out in tears. I was abused slightly physically but more mentally as a child which I had put it down to but now I am sure that that has nothing to do with it and I just have high level of emotions. I hate to let people see me cry and see it as a weakness. I do not want people to feel sorry for me when I cry and when I read Alexis no 16 I felt for her but did not cry until I read Debbie, 18 and it made me cry to think of her relating to Alexis. I wish I could control my tears but if I try to, it makes it worse then I get into a state and cannot speak then I make noise because I am crying so much and feel even more stupid. I do not ever feel better after I cry in front of someone, I just feel stupid. I suppose I do feel better after I cry if I am alone. I never cry for myself when I am alone. I also find it so interesting that people that don’t cry’ want to. Having read these pages and tried to find an answer to my crying dilema, I am non the wiser. I still don’t want to cry in front of people for no apparent reason. If I could just control it. I have thought about going to the doctor but feel stupid saying that I cry for no reason, I am sure I am not ‘depressed’ maybe a hormone imbalance though. I have also thought about a councellor but they will just go into my child hood which is full of emotions so I am bound to cry but to be honest I know that nothing can be changed about it and it has probably made me a better person because having experienced what I did means I treat other beings well. I do have very high moods and very low moods and often no in between. I hope it all works out for you all. xx

    gillian, October 19, 2010 at 4:08 pm
  37. It’s good to know that I’m not a freak and THERE ARE some people like me.. I have just turned 14 last month and I believe that I haven’t cried in 6 years… It’s just frustrating at times.. I am a good student at school and all of my report cards are filled with A+s but I can’t do one simple thing… Cry… When people do things or call me names, they think that it might trigger me and make me cry… But I just don’t.. They then start to think that I’m cold-hearted.. Which is way far from the truth.. It just ripes you to pieces inside… People who can cry are so lucky! You better thank God for that gift!

    AGirl, November 16, 2010 at 11:28 am
  38. I have always been this way, even as a small child. I never cry anymore, When I even feel like it, I can’t make myself cry. When I could cry, I never cried tears for some reason. Plus I had a very traumatic childhood. I had a grandmother that died when I was only eight, and I suffered for well over a year with depression from losing her. Then my father always belittled me and called me names, my mom always told me I wasn’t normal. Plus I was teased throughout my teenagehood. The last time I even came close to crying, was so long ago I can’t even remember. I try to listen to sad music and watch sad things on TV but still cannot cry. I wish I could but it’s just impossible. I watch the news and hear and read about the children and animals that suffer from abuse I still can’t cry, I want to know how I can?

    Sheri, November 19, 2010 at 6:11 pm
  39. I’m 27 y/o now and haven’t cried in 16 years. In fact, I remember the exact moment of the last time I did cry. I’ve been unable to cry at funerals of family and friends or extremely sad moments in my life. I’ve felt almost emotionally disconnected for this entire time.

    I’ve started having some really healthy cries for the last couple weeks after breaking up with my girlfriend of 5 years (whom I was going to propose to). Certain things will trigger memories and I’ll just start tearing up, other times I’ll just start sobbing. Even unrelated things, like emotional scenes in movies, will trigger a response. I’ve become much more aware of what I’m feeling/thinking recently and the peace that comes with that. I feel like I’m growing again and have become much more in tune with myself and what’s going on around me. Its sad that it’s taken this loss for me to recognize this change.

    Learning To Cry Again, November 27, 2010 at 12:59 am
  40. i’m 13,which is younger than i’ve seen anyone else with this problem. I go through alot everyday and have relationship issues at many times,but i never cry,no matter how badly i want to. Crying always made me feel better due to the release of endorphines,but i randomly got to the point where i could not cry,which is very unhealthy if i’m not mistaken. I believe the problem is either related to blocked tear ducts,or it could simply be like fear,as in: things that have made you cry before are now something you’re emotionally immune to,or things less depressing than that specific event cannot make you cry because you know things could be much worse. I haven’t cried in about two years for school related problems which shall remain anonymous. Ever since that day,i have not shed a single tear.

    brandon, January 12, 2011 at 12:10 am
  41. I don’t cry anymore. I make sobbing noises, and my eyes water. I have been through too much these last years. I need to cry, but it doesn’t happen.

    Linda, February 13, 2011 at 8:55 pm
  42. I can empathize with all those who cannot cry. I went through quite a traumatic childhood and have discovered that I seem to be unable to cry even though it has been almost twenty years since those times. A recent example is that my grandmother passed away late in 2010, and even though I didn’t find out for three months, when I finally got the news I found myself unable to cry. My grandmother meant more to me than almost anyone, so my inability to cry made me feel even worse, and yet the tears still did not come. I have been told by countless shrinks that I have some pretty severe emotional issues to work out, but personally I believe that every situation, no matter how grim or depressing it may seem, can be taken in at least a slightly positive perspective. Obviously there are exceptions, but there aren’t that many. I admit that there have been quite a few times when I wanted to cry until I couldn’t cry anymore, but I am able to see that the tears wouldn’t have changed anything. Crying can be very beneficial to some people, but for others like myself, it isn’t as neccessary. Call me emotionally damaged or whatever you want, but while my experiences may have made it harder for me to cry, they have also made me a better person for having survived in the first place.

    Jorge M, May 5, 2011 at 7:53 am
  43. my best friend can’t cry ! she says that when she gets so mad she get pissed off and finally she doesn’t cry’! i need to now what’s going on with her ! because it’s really affecting her in a bad way!
    I’m hoping to find a way to let her cry a bit ! i’m doing some reaserches but i can’t understand a word!
    what am i supposed to do?!

    ja-zzy, May 17, 2011 at 12:09 pm
  44. Everyone says “you’re like the girl from ‘The Holiday’ ” – except they don’t know that it is against my will that I cannot cry. If I had one wish in life, it would be able to cry.

    I quit crying when I was twelve to test myself to see how long I could go and would force myself not to cry for years at a time.

    I was prom queen, homecoming queen, class favorite, star athlete, never had an enemy in my life before college, perfect “role model” babysitter. I am a genuinely positive person who loves life and I am not depressed.

    A few years ago, I realized stopping tears was ridiculous and a stupid endurance test and started yearning for the ability to literally shed tears. I swear I have handicapped this ability forever.

    It’s like my tear ducts are paralyzed, however bad I WANT to cry… I literally can not! My body won’t let me! I’ve been through at least five family deaths, a sudden break up after a healthy five year relationship, graduation/moving to college, and loads of other typical young woman trials that should definitely warrant tears, but I can’t! It is driving me nuts. Not being able to release my emotions makes me feel inhuman, weighed down, and frustrated beyond belief.

    I just want help because no one understands. Pain, death, sappy movies, NOTHING can release the feeling. I blog, journal, talk to friends, and try to release my emotions other ways but NOTHING helps. I just want to cry. I feel numb and unreal.

    can't cry, May 28, 2011 at 4:22 pm
  45. Okay, so i am quiet a bit worried for my boyfriend. he said he cried once i believe but when he was a little kid, right now he is 17, but somehow ever since that one time, he said he cant cry anymore, he gets watery eyes but no matter how sad,down, depressive, he is, his body wont let him, so he believes is maybe because his eyes when they get watery it overflows. but i been trying to get him to cry at least when i am there so i can comfort him, because even if he is alone he cant cry, neither when people around. and thats getting him pretty down and frustrated because he wants to n feels like it at times, but he just cant and he doesn’t know what could help him do so, because i don’t want him to hold on that stress because it just puts him down. and gets me sad that i cant help him out because i cant make him cry when i am there. so PLEASE!!! WE NEED HELP..!!! HHOW or WHAt could help, him get at least a tear out so his body releases that stressed he has been holding back for so long. i told him that maybe is medical condition but he said he doesn’t think so because he said he is able to get watery eyes but cannot cry let tear out, so PLEASE!! HELP!!!! ASP.

    sharon, June 25, 2011 at 4:09 pm
  46. This is just like me. Can’t cry. I am just like that. I’ve even written to Dear Abby and a doctor. Neither of them have published my problem. I really need to know what’s wrong with me.

    Sheri, July 30, 2011 at 8:31 pm
  47. I’m 15. I dated this girl that I fell in love with and then she broke up with me and I cried like crazy. That was the last time I cried and it was almost a year ago. I don’t know why I can’t cry. It annoys me because I can’t produce tears like normal people. When I broke my arm a few years ago, I didn’t cry. When I sprained my arm a year later, I still didn’t cry. Earlier this year, I sprained my wrist and still didn’t cry. I also cracked both of my heels and didn’t cry. Physical pain only made me cry when I was really young (around age 10 and under). Emotional pain stopped after that horrible break up. I don’t have PTSD and I’m not depressed because I have an amazing life. If anyone could help me, please do. I really need an explanation…

    Joe, August 15, 2011 at 11:24 am
  48. Recently my son-in-law died suddenly and instantly, and I flew immediately to my daughter in another state. I did not cry, but only put one foot in front of the other trying to help her.

    I cried a little at the memorial. What is wrong with me? I loved this man, and my daughter and he had a wonderful marriage cut short after 20 years.

    Now I am home and she is on her own. I am here and feel empty and very sad, but cannot cry. I didn’t cry at my mother, father, or mother-in-law’s funerals either, yet sobbed when Mom & Dad’s dog died, because I suddenly realized that my only connection to them was gone. My work to help them was over.

    I miss this son-in-law very much. He was very intelligent, fun, witty, and had a 6th sense about life. What a loss to the world.

    joan lamb, August 19, 2011 at 8:55 pm
  49. there is a difference between the emotional abilty to cry and the physical aspects that affect lack of lacrimal function. i have a child who suffered severe, traumatic brain injury and has surpassed any expected recovery or achievement. in fact, if you didn’t know of her injury (she was hit by a car & suffered TBI; at Mass General for a month+, followed by rehabiltation inpatient & outpatient. today, she attends her age-equivalent academics & sports (sports restricted only by recurrent head injury).
    her accident ocurred on her left side. when she cries, her left eye does not produce lacrimation.
    all for tonight

    lori, September 15, 2011 at 10:13 pm
  50. Im a teenager about 13 1/2 and I haven’t cried since I was seven. I came
    Close one or twice but I barely can get my eyes to water…I still feel worse than crying at that time but I was never depressed…my girlfriend of 3 months dumped me which is for a teen very very tough but still not even my eyes watered. The feeling is like a hell on earth and there is no way to just let go…I also have a very bad temper almost lik anger management….I think this plays a big role in that and vice versa. Does anyone else get angry and almost hostile to let something that should make you sad out? Please help…

    jackson, October 1, 2011 at 11:54 pm
  51. I am 48 years old, and I haven’t cried in 20 years. Even when I could, I hardly ever produced tears. The last time I felt like crying was when I watched the movie Ramona and Beezus, when the family cat died. I lost my 18-year old cat three years ago and didn’t cry then. I have an 8-year old great nephew who was abandoned by my niece, he livs with his fathers family and they really don’t want him. He is filled with pain and anger. I just hug him and I want to cry but can’t. I’m so depressed and angry. Could someone out there please help me?

    Sheri, October 25, 2011 at 2:33 pm
  52. The field of psychology and psychiatry is one big joke. Look at all the people here who can’t get help. I’ve been searching for more than seven years for the reason why I can’t feel emotions. One day it got stuck in a lump in my chest when I was 14 and I couldn’t cry and I’ve been numb ever since. Not even one doctor knows what I’m talking about. They just diagnosed me with random disorders, like PTSD, bipolar, add, depression, none of which I really had. On the internet this is one of the only places where people actually know what I’m talking about. If anyone here knows a solution, PLEASE contact me! dfdivino@hotmail.com

    Dee, November 1, 2011 at 6:47 pm
  53. When I was young I cried when I got spanked or when someone died. But my parents made fun of me when I cried, they thought it was funny to see me cry. My dad always told me it was a weakness to cry, he would threaten to spank me if I cried. Today I don’t cry over anything and I’m always depressed or angry.

    John, December 13, 2011 at 9:44 am
  54. Well, I guess it is somewhat of a relief that I am not alone. I haven’t been able to cry for over 7 years. I got a call Sunday night that my best friend died unexpectedly. The news dropped me to my knees..and then, nothing. No tears, not a one. I feel a wierd sense of grief in little, brief spurts. That’s it. I wish someone knew what could be done?

    Nancy, January 17, 2012 at 6:36 pm
  55. I lost my son in a car accident in 1987 and I cried off and on for three years. I cannot cry at all now. I think it has been almost 20 years and like the other people I wish I could cry. I also lost my husband of 30 years. He grew apart from me and I barely can talk to him. We are divorced but still reside together due to financial reasons and he is mean and treats me like I am stupid and old only my friends think otherwise. I get really sad wish my life was not so stressful but I do not know what to do most of the time.

    Linda, January 21, 2012 at 1:01 pm
  56. Hi, There is a medical condition called Sjogrens Syndrome one of the symptoms being the inability to shed tears. It can develop gradually or sufferers can be born dry eyed! The emotional problems are similar to those already mentioned. It was interesting to read above, about the happy hormones released through crying – so they do serve a purpose! My sympathy goes to those who can’t cry and suffer the frustrations of not being able to release their emotions.

    Ann, February 7, 2012 at 6:38 am
  57. The last time I cried was approx 5 years ago, and before that it was probably an interval of at least another 5 years or more. I believe it would do me some good if somehow I was able to have a good cry and release some emotions. I never really thought much about other people in this same situation until a few minutes ago, and that it was led me to this site. I appreciated seeing what other people shared.

    Madison, February 9, 2012 at 10:10 pm
  58. I am in my 60’s — I used to be able to cry but now have a complete inability to cry no matter how sad I feel, no matter how much I feel like crying/want to cry. I haven’t cried since 1990, except for about 1 min. ten years ago when my
    cat died very suddenly & unexpectedly of unknown cause. My mom died in ’92 & I was at her bedside for 3 days while she was in a coma & I knew she was about to die. I felt like there was a rope tied tightly around my neck, but could not cry. Last week my best friend died suddenly & I am heartbroken, but cannot cry.
    I even tried to force myself to cry — faking crying sounds, but that’s all that came out — fake sounds. I did have a traumatic experience in 1990 when a man I loved very much & was with a long time, dumped me completely unexpectedly. I did cry a lot then, I don’t remember if it was weeks or months.
    Since then I haven’t been able to cry. My eyes do tear when I cut onions so I don’t think I have blocked tear ducts. I feel I need to cry to get some release of my sadness now because of the loss of my friend. This is the 1st time I’ve looked on the Internet re this, but there doesn’t seem to be any answer to how to be able to cry. It’s certainly not that I don’t feel emotion or am cold-hearted — I feel like I’m crying inside but it doesn’t come out.

    madlyn, February 24, 2012 at 2:10 am
  59. Tania posted this in ’09 so she’s probably not looking at this site anymore.
    I copied here part of what she posted —
    “Strong emotions cause our brains to release chemicals that indirectly lead to teary eyes.”

    “Is there not a part of the brain that can be damaged when someone can’t cry? For example, maybe the chemical-releasing part of the brain that causes tearing when you feel a strong emotion can be releasing the chemicals/hormones/neurotransmitters at the wrong time or not at all.”

    This certainly seems possible & logical to me. But wouldn’t
    psychiatrists/doctors know this ? I’ve never heard it before.
    If it is true, maybe there’s some way to fix that damage in the brain which would enable someone to be able to cry again. Does anyone know if what Tania
    wrote is true ?

    madlyn, February 24, 2012 at 2:43 am
  60. Well ….I slit my wrists so I guess u could say I’m depressed. Never knew how depressed I actually was. I looked this up because
    I found it very irritating that I can’t cry when I rly want 2. I feel like all the emotions inside me are just bottled up and killing me from the inside…..oh how I wish I could cry…I would do anything to cry right now. Anything.

    unimportantperson, April 3, 2012 at 4:30 pm
  61. i used to cry. i enjoyed a good cry. as a child i was encouraged to cry after getting a ‘boo-boo’ or having something sad happen. my mother always told me a “good cry” will make you feel better & it did. i used be able to let the tears flow listening to certain music or watching an emotional movie. now, i haven’t cried in about 4 years. i suffered a very emotional trauma about that time. maybe that is why i’ve lost the ability to cry. oh, i miss crying so much. i actually feel as if i’ve lost a part of myself. i remember how a wracking, sobbing, good cry always left me feeling lighter on the inside. i am so heavy inside now. eh, maybe someday.

    afterthewaltz, May 4, 2012 at 5:17 pm
  62. p.s. to the person who left a comment just before me……….no one is unimportant !!!!!!!!!!!

    afterthewaltz, May 4, 2012 at 5:19 pm
  63. I’m fifteen I haven’t cried since I was twelve is there any mental illnesses that can cause the lack of sadness. I can think of something sad my eyes will water then I yawn and it goes away its very frustrating. My sister was very abusive and she hit me every day dand I used to cry. Now I just don’t cry my favorite mothers aunt died recently and I couldn’t even shed a tear. Oh and mental illness is very prominent in my family.

    Tomatobeard, May 11, 2012 at 10:47 pm
  64. People would die along the way over the years & I would not shed a tear. 7 Months ago, my oldest son@33 very gifted,incredibly high IQ, almost a doctor, died unexpectedly. 3 weeks ago my healthy Mom died(she had lived a long happy life but her end was sudden cancer that took her fast within 3 months). These two people are my life, so close I can not explain or make anyone understand. I finally cried when my son died so much my skin all over my body turned red. Every day now I cry…I am beginning to think I may never be able to control it & I really don’t care. I just miss them so much. It does not seem real. I am busy all day & the pain will not stop. I certainly can cry now…

    Sis, May 22, 2012 at 8:33 pm
  65. Reading these posts has made me reflect and analyze my own “dry-spell” situation from years ago. I don’t know a lot in regards to medical conditions associated with decreased tear production, but I do have some personal insight in overcoming the emotional side of the condition. I went through some really difficult things when I was in my early 20’s and was unable to cry for nearly 3 years. I would do everything I could to force it out but was unable to produce tears. Finally, after 3 years, I was able to cry again. I don’t know that there are any quick fixes to the problem and I’m sure everyone is different, but for me there were a few changes I needed to make in order to properly feel emotion again. First of all, I feel that I had to become aware of what was causing the problem. For me, the situations were so difficult that I didn’t want to “feel” their impact anymore. As a result, I kind of shut down. I believe it was a coping mechanism for me. I was afraid to feel because the pain was sometimes debilitating. I put up a wall. Instead of feeling sadness, I felt anger, coldness or emptiness. This protected me in a sense and shielded me from pain. I have realized that it was a choice (in a way). I could feel anger/emptiness or pain. And it took me a long time to want to feel the pain again. Of course it’s not a switch you can just flip on and off. It takes time and courage. For me I had to proactively find ways to both soften my heart and give me courage. Not by watching sad movies or going through sad experiences. The shutting down is a protective mechanism and these things only exacerbated the problem. I found internal and external forces that could support me and prepare me for when I went through trials or needed/wanted to cry. Getting closer to family members and friends, exercising, researching ways to deal with depression, and most importantly (for ME) was participating actively in my religion. Doing anything I could to feel a general sense of peace in my life completely changed me. I feel so much better now. Not that things are perfect, but I can definitely cry when I need to and that releases some sadness and helps me cope. I also have less anger and more sympathy for others. I know that everyone has different experiences and ways to overcome this. These are just things that helped me. I’m curious to know what other people have done to overcome this!

    NowCanCry, May 28, 2012 at 10:27 am
  66. I am nearly 15 years old and I have not been diagnosed with depression or any other mental disorder and am not on any medications, I feel as though I might be depressed though. I lost my mom just over a year ago and the last time I cried was at her funeral. I just desperately feel the need to cry but I can’t let it out…

    Kia, June 21, 2012 at 10:23 pm
  67. I am a huge crybaby, I cried just this morning when I thought I was being held back in school. I have not lost anybody in my family (except for a cat) I just cry more than normal. I also was depressed and thought I was useless and soulless. I’m sorry all depressed people, please get over it soon.

    Liam, September 5, 2012 at 8:46 pm
  68. i used to cry for everything; my birds death and my paternal grandmother’s. then i joined the marines . i had an injury. i was lrt go. since then my fishie died. and then my cat. an ddddgrandma passed away last night. not even loss of appetite.d important not even sad. i know all life ends. but i dnt understand why i cantecry. my current job wojt allow keep to go see a psychiatrist without explicit permission from my CO. i thought kmabe u guys could have an answer o_O ???

    Sam, September 25, 2012 at 3:26 am
  69. I cry alot, and i don’t like my friends seeing me cry. Its very very….embarrassing.
    I may be 10, but I am pretty sensitive. My friend Chloe called me a lesbian, and I cried. AND IM OLDER THAN HER!!! Thing is i need help controlling a very rude and mean friend. (Chloe) Can anyone give some advice?

    Kiara, October 4, 2012 at 8:32 am
  70. I would like to know what i can do about my dry eyes please give me some kind of information that will help me and other with this problem

    Jewel, November 25, 2012 at 4:00 pm
  71. I know that there is a Doctor out there that can help us with a answer are a solution to this problem.

    Jewel, November 25, 2012 at 4:06 pm
  72. I’m 16, and over the past two years, I feel constantly sad. It’s easy to pretend I’m happy but when I’m alone, I become overwhelmed with so much pain my heart hurts, like literally my chest hurts. I used to cry all the time like a year and a half ago, then it became every once in awhile I would really cry really hard, but now all I want to do is cry and I can’t! I just water up and no tears come out. It feels terrible, and I’m really really scared that I might actually be depressed but at the same time I don’t want to tell my parents and have it be an over exaggeration

    Kelsey, January 9, 2013 at 2:05 am
  73. Found this because I did a search to try to figure out why I can’t cry. Like many commenting here, I was a BIG crier most of my life. Didn’t take much. Sadness, but also commercials, game shows, etc. Twelve years ago, my husband and I moved to West Africa for his job. The difficulty of life there made me a stronger person. But after about 4 years of being exposed to a whole differently reality than what we experience in the U.S., I suddenly found myself unable to cry anymore. I can certainly experience a wide range of emotions including sadness and frustration, but the events that provoke it are quite different. Perspective has changed. I find that when I have an emotional response that normally would provoke crying, I sometimes get a lump in my throat and feel like I NEED to cry, but nothing comes. Only occasionally will I feel a cry coming, but then it seems to just dissipate. Other than a few tears, I haven’t had a good cry since 2004. I know that crying is healthy and a wonderful emotional release. But it just doesn’t come.

    Jennifer, February 4, 2013 at 12:37 pm
  74. My step-son is 10 years old and I have never seen him cry. He’s had multiple fractures from playing outside (foot and arm), and last year he tried to dive into a pool and clipped his chin on the edge so hard that not only did he need stitches to his chin, but also had his teeth bit thru his lip and got stitches to his mouth. Before anyone jumps to conclusions, he was never with me and his father, but in the care of his mother that lives in another state. Anyway, it just strikes me very odd that throughout all these times, he’s never shed one tear. He can express laughter and anger, but never any sort of sadness and it worries me. He has 2 older sisters; all 3 children have different fathers and the mother is always in and out of different relationships. I don’t know if any of that has anything to do with it, but thought I’d share that if it meant anything? I feel he’s suppressing a lot of anger and doesn’t know how to filter his emotions and when I bring this up to my husband, he thinks it’s nothing and that he was exactly that way when he was that age, but he did cry when he was angry so I think he’s missing the point I’m trying to make. He’s a wonderful little boy, but I feel like I’m the only one who cares to notice how he behaves. My sister seems to think that he has some sort of “Aspergers Syndrome”, but he doesn’t seem to have any trouble interacting with people. I don’t know?? I just can’t bring myself to understand why he can feel pain, but never show it.

    Belle, February 11, 2013 at 1:14 pm
  75. Im 13 years old, have a sick mother, an abusive father, and no real friends. I have not (to my knowledge) cryed since I was 3 years old. I have a very high pain threshold, however, and I am very protective. I have fought with my father multiple times, both verbally and physically, to protect my little sister, who is a bit of a crybaby, and only 5. I am the one who cleans the house and cooks, and I haven’t smiled for years, I haven’t spoken aloud for several more. Backchat makes father angry. I care for my sister, but one day I know my dad will catch her alone, and there will be nothing I can do about it. All I want is protection for her, but no one can provide it. I don’t expect to live for very long, 3 more years at most, my sister will be on her own- I can’t let that happen to her or mum, but I also scare them both with my inability to express emotion- and I cant protect them.

    NoEmotionNessecary, March 6, 2013 at 7:36 am
  76. I’m 13 years old, and I fear that I’ll be incapable of crying. My boyfriend and I have had a really complicated relationship for a really long time now and it’s made me feel terrible to where I felt depressed, I couldn’t eat, I had insomnia, and I cried and cried for months at night. My story may seem insignificant to other stories, but this has had an impact on my life in a huge way. I feel sad and depressed on the inside, tears usually come out, but not anymore.

    Sienna, March 8, 2013 at 4:18 am
  77. I’m a 14 year old girl. I have never since I’ve been born produced tears. My parents have taken me to doctors and they told us that some people just can’t produce tears no matter what. However they have to add drops into their eyes as they will be dry and scaly. I do not produce tears and never have, I have moist eyes though and do not need drops. Doctors call me a mystery. They won’t look into why I don’t produce tears and don’t have dry eyes at the same time as they say I have healthy eyes and it isn’t causing me any problems. I would really like to know why I am so different to everyone else. I understand some people don’t produce tears and have dry eyes but I’m more different to them. I need answers. If anybody knows anything about this or who I can speak to please E-Mail me: jessicaloumorrison@yahoo.co.uk

    Jesscia, March 9, 2013 at 5:00 pm
  78. I am 15 and i cannot cry either. I have no idea why, i have lots of family issues that are bad but i dont think i am depressed. As far as i know at least. I apparently have a high pain threshold and have broken my arm twice without a tear, but i cant cry at anything, when my dogs died, when i lost my best friend, aforementioned family issues and losing my girlfriend. All within 6 months (bar one broken arm). and not one tear. Help please?

    Id rather not have to be named, March 29, 2013 at 2:27 am
  79. I think this is among the most vital info
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    l desk, March 31, 2013 at 6:53 pm
  80. Its weird when I’m crying to God all of a sudden He stops my years like dries my eyeballs & I wonder why He would do something like that to me. The bible says nothing against crying so why would He harras me with this. It just makes me mad. Anyways I would hope that on not the only one bit idk.

    cheyanne, April 12, 2013 at 1:15 am
  81. God is taking the pain away, Cheyanne. Or if you want to look at it scientifically, you could have any one of the physiological or psychological things which causes this to happen to people. It could be as simple as a “quickly regulating chemistry” or even dehydration. Or maybe depression, or large tear ducts which empty tears quickly into the nasal passages before they fall down your face. Being mad at God is only being angry at what you don’t understand. Like a pet cat freaking out and biting you if it’s put on a merry-go-round.

    Teddy, April 25, 2013 at 3:18 pm
  82. I can cry a little bit at small things like movie scenes but when my really close friend died recently I couldn’t cry unless other people were crying around me but even then I only teared up a bit. I used to love just sitting in my room and crying everything away but I can’t do it anymore and I really wish I could.

    Danielle, May 26, 2013 at 4:48 pm
  83. I know how Jessica feels. I am the same way. I have never once in my life produced tears while crying. My eyes are not dry, they water but I can’t produce tears. But I still haven’t cried in over twenty years. My father died last October and I still haven’t cried . All my life, he made my life miserable, He was a bully, he physically, mentally and emotionally abused me. He would whip me with belts, slam me down in chairs, shake me push me around, grab me by the arm and get right in my face and stick his finger in it, he would corner me like a dog. He was always telling me I was no good. My mother was the same way, but she was abused as a child and went right into marriage with the same kind of person. My father asked me forgiveness and I accepted his appology. But I still can’t cry. But I hate to say this, my mom and I are free from the non stop barbs that were always being said.

    Sheri, June 3, 2013 at 9:28 am
  84. It is kinda strange when you get to the state where you cannot cry.

    the closest thing i can say that it is like is when you hurt yourself and you laugh instead of saying ouch or whatever.

    but instead of crying you do nothing. no laughing nothing. but you have the emotional feeling of sadness.

    poop, June 5, 2013 at 9:57 am
  85. 2010 I cried over absolutely everything.
    2011 I cried over quite a lot of things
    2012 I cried a little bit
    2013 This year, I have not cried at all – I haven’t cried for 9 months.
    I am now 14 years old and I’m not sure if anything is wrong. Some people says as long as I’m not running away from reality when sad things happens I’ll be fine. But after reading this, I feel a bit worried. Lots of times when I’m absolutely stressed and tired, I have a head ache feeling that makes me want to cry but not able to. Is there anything wrong?

    Chloe Ulysses, June 21, 2013 at 5:56 am
  86. I am 25 years old, only once cried at the age of 12 and never again. What this condition will be said in Psychological terms.

    Abubakar, July 7, 2013 at 12:33 am
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  88. im actually 15 and since i was 10 i cannot shed emotional tears. if i’m physically hurt i will cry but if im emotional i give dry sobs. is that normal? i cry but no tears every come out

    alyssa g, August 7, 2013 at 3:50 pm
  89. im 20 have hade a few things happen in the past and I haven’t been able to cry in 6 years I know this because I’ve felt like crying ever sense a particular event. but I guess it doesn’t help if I don’t say what it was that caused my problem and I would like advice, so that day my baby sister passed away. I think my problem might be guilt because I feel I should’ve been there for here even though I was just 10 feet away. and yet I could nothing to help but listen to what was happening, I just sat there and id nothing at all
    sorry but this is what I needed im finaly did what I needed im crying bad thanks

    arenK, September 6, 2013 at 8:21 am
  90. I just feel very down and I feel as if I can just cry I’ll feel so much better.. But I just can’t and is tearing me apart inside..

    Kendall B, October 9, 2013 at 8:22 pm
  91. I think that not crying is a question of maturity not a problem or mental health case.We that don’t cry are realists above all. Many of us we been through alot and don’t cry over spilled milk or whatever.Because we now theres a beginning and end for everthing injustice and bad things are part of life and sometimes we cannot do nothing because we are powerless, dont have money or something else.
    One more thing here in portugal theres a show were the famous talk about there lifes and show themselfes very sensitive and caring i bet in their daily life they aren’t like that and sometimes send others to !!!??.
    My conclusion like Sylvester Stallone would say It’s all Bullsh####

    Pedro Alcobia, October 18, 2013 at 5:49 pm
  92. (caution a little descriptive at the end) (blood) I’m 16 years old. I have very rarely cried. Its not that I want to or don’t want to. I just realize that things happen. My grandma just died recently…didn’t cry. She was old, happy and lived a long life… I realize that life has an end. When I think when my girlfriend will die someday. yeah I get sad and the tears come…but they don’t spill over…granted that is just a hypothetically true thought (it will happen someday but it hasn’t yet) but I still don’t technically cry. I also don’t feel that much physical pain…I was riding my bike got hit by a golf cart wasn’t wearing a shirt fell on my back on gravel going about 20 mph… I walked away with blood dripping from my pant legs…. Is there a problem with me?? No I don’t think so. I know how to handle life and death. Am I saying that those who cry don’t? No everybody handles everything in their own way.

    Ryan D, October 21, 2013 at 12:50 pm
  93. I am 57 years old and can’t remember the last time tears fell from my eyes. While experiencing situations that would make anyone cry, my nose runs, my eyes turn red, and my eyes moisten….but…no tears. I used to be able to cry. Now I can’t and haven’t for years. I wish I were able to shed tears. I know I would feel better.

    Henrietta T, November 30, 2013 at 2:26 pm
  94. I am 14 years old and I have never cried, I mean yeah I get upset and I feel as if I could cry but I have never in my life shed a single tear. I am not depressed and I do not have PTSD I just have never been able to cry.I’ve heard of all this lacrimal glands and blocked tear ducts but it doesn’t seem right, if I had blocked tear ducts wouldn’t that mean I’d cry more? I want to go to the doctors but my mother won’t let me as she says it’s “nothing to worry about” but it’s really annoying. I just want to be able to cry. I want to know what it feels like to have tears rushing down my face, to taste the supposed saltiness, and the rush of emotions be free. It’s hurtful when people call you heartless or insensitive. I don’t want that anymore. If anyone has any information on this or knows how I feel please contact me at Leah.maria@hotmail.co.uk. Thank you

    Leah, December 7, 2013 at 6:21 pm
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    Blake, December 19, 2013 at 12:32 pm
  96. I have been on here numerous times. I went off my meds back in September and was able to feel sadness after almost twenty years. But after my family insisted that I go back on my antidepressents I am back to not feeling sad anymore. Last Saturday I fell backwards with a twenty five pound pack of botled water and hit my head on a concrete carport. I hurt so badly but I still couldn’t cry. I want to know if anyone can help me? I heard that people that don’t cry die early. I don’t want to die early.

    Sheri, January 8, 2014 at 8:11 pm
  97. my best friend hasnt been able to cry for years and i need answers he is freaking out and i need an explanation he is a great guy but i need him to feel great he has started having nightmares because of the stress and i need anybody to give me a real answer

    bonjovie, February 17, 2014 at 5:26 pm
  98. Am 22 years old & i haven’t cried since i was 12. Its not like i don’t want to, i just can’t. I lost my Dad & my big sister last year everyone cried, i was the only who stood out.

    George .L., April 8, 2014 at 6:41 am
  99. I am 21 and I rarely ever cry and its stressing me out!! I don’t know why that is but I only cry when I’m in a fight with my mom. Even then its just a couple of tears. I live in a very cold house. Me and my older sister hardly ever have physical contact like hugs. I don’t even remember the last time my mom hugged me sincerely. Ever since my grandmother died maybe 6 years ago she’s been so cold with us. One of my good friend can cry easily and I feel like she’s always doing things to make me cry. Going to see sad movies, listening to sad music and when she sees I don’t cry I feel like she’s judging me. Everyone is judging me saying I don’t have a heart or I don’t have empathy and it hurts so much!! I just wish I could release all this stress but I can’t and I hate myself for it.

    merle. c, June 6, 2014 at 1:38 am
  100. I hate you and cry about it

    Garry, July 9, 2014 at 11:38 pm
  101. Hello

    Very interesting posts. I tend to sit on the fence with this one and there are no splinters so won’t cry!!!
    Anyhow as a young schoolchild I was occasionally bullied. Would go running to the teacher crying. I cried at thw drop of a hat and as easily as laughing but the former for the wrong reasons ie I should have stood up to the bullies.
    Now my theory is this. Is laughter the opposite to crying. If so why do I laugh at situations someone else may consider is laughable.
    Or is that the point. We develop the ability to laugh instead of cry as opposed to cry more than laughing.
    It may be a sign of maturation whereby the positive action of laughing is therapeutic. The need to cry is diminished the more we to deal with life.

    Perhaps those of us who have had more than their share of troubles develop a higher threshold to cry.

    Betty, July 16, 2014 at 12:42 am
  102. Oh dear my grammar is diabolical in my previous post. I should have said why do I laugh at situations others might consider is a crying offence. (Or should that be sitting on a fence with splinters in le derrière).

    Lets call laughter giggling. And crying – well crying.

    Giggling is an immature action. Crying over spilt milk, losing a nail, all things high drama is an immature action. So we grow up hopefully and giggling transforms into laughter.
    But crying is crying and the way it transforms itself is that we find the threshold for hurt that makes us cry increases.

    Now perhaps I should have penned some tearjerker comments . So are you crying cause I didn’t??
    So you now see I have a fair soh . If you are laughing there is hope for all.

    Betty, July 16, 2014 at 12:58 am
  103. Interesting that I am emotional person. As on horrid news stories I don’t usally cry.

    However ine xception thi slatest disaster of the shoot downof Malaysia flight MH-017 between Amsterdam and Kuala Lumpur over Ukraine I DID ‘huilen’ (cry)! I am Swiss with Japanese and Dutch background and when I heard the horrible tragedy of from 154 – 189 fellow Dutchg nationals who lost their lives totally unwarranted and needlessly, I f***ing cried! I actually broke down and lost myself in tears. I felt that a part of me had also died in that crash as well.

    Also there is a new ambient rock group (from Tim Bettinson) called Vancouver Sleep Clinic as he has eight songs one being ‘Hold On We are Going Home. It is metaphoric of going back to the source, the ‘Other Side’ (Transition or death) The lyrics had a strong emotional impact onme and I burst out into tears!

    or some good films I can cry as well. Otherwise I do find it hard to cry especially at funerals or memorial services (perhaps as being a Rosicrucian student I understand the concept of the eternal soul and reincarnation). Also being a young gay man (24) and see something of my peers getseriously hurt or die (or suicide attempts), that also triggers my own crying response as well (as that could have been me)!

    Sato Tatsuhiro, July 27, 2014 at 4:09 am
  104. Please pardon the typos in above comment as this keyboard is not very good! Sorry for the poor spellings!

    Sato Tatsuhiro, July 27, 2014 at 4:12 am
  105. I turned 14 in march and ever since from that day when my gran dies which was like 3 years ago I carnt cry I’ve never done it infact I hardly ever cry I never cry in pain I dont know what’s wrong I haven’t told no one about it that’s the thing:/

    Aguy, August 6, 2014 at 8:01 am
  106. I used to cry all the time as a kid. Sometimes a sad piece of music was enough to trigger it. Then I had an experience where someone I trusted used that to publicly humiliate me and after that I didn’t cry one tear for over 6 years. I didn’t feel as much as I had before either. I could analytically understand what someone was feeling from their words, gestures, expressions, etc. but the feeling of understanding how they felt was gone. I also started getting random, sharp pains in my chest, like a heart attack.

    There were times more recently that I was able to cry, like getting dumped or when my best friend died but even then it wasn’t spontaneous feeling, I had to focus and bring the emotion to the forefront and immerse myself in it purposely before feeling that. Lately I’ve done a lot of soul searching to understand how I think and why I think that way and admitted some things to myself that I had been repressing. One of them was that I had been heartbroken, and as soon as I realized and accepted all those things and wasn’t afraid of it it was like a portion of myself was restored, the walls that had separated it crumbled and fell away and an energy flooded into a place in my chest that Had not felt that in a loooooong time.

    I cried and cried tears of joy just because I could truly feel again. Now I can feel everything so much more, I feel motivation and happiness and like I was broken for 10 years and am finally whole again. I feel like I’m balanced on to of the world and I wouldn’t go back for anything. I’m never turning this off again.

    micaiah, August 15, 2014 at 10:46 am
  107. Okay so i read this and i was wondering if thats the answer to my question. Im 17 years old ive been diagnosed with depression since i was 12. Sometimes i could cry alot and i cant stop crying while in other situations i can’t cry at all. I wish to cry when something hurtful happens or i remember something hurtful but i just cant get tears out. Does this happen because i have depression?

    Alondra, August 24, 2014 at 5:01 pm
  108. Date : 10/09/2014.

    Regarding sir,
    i am so sad because my elder sister since 23 yrs because chicken pox and after she can’t see and no tears in her eyes when she has very sad she can’t cry because her eyes can’t products tears she had use so many drop and tube it can’t help to her and our family finance it is not well but i request sir please tell me very powerful medicine for this condition.
    Thanking you,
    yours faithfully,

    seema talkar, September 9, 2014 at 4:20 am
  109. Well I used to cry all the time, then all of a sudden it quit, I couldn’t cry anymore. I am a diabetic which brought on cateracts, they removed them, then 4 years ago I stopped crying. I went to my eye Dr. and he examined my eyes and told me that I have severe dry eyes. So he put in tear ducts in my eyes. I still can’t cry like I would like to, but I do have just a little moisture come out when I am heart broken. But the Dr. said that I will never cry again like I used to. So maybe you have dry eye syndroms. They say that it affects 50 to 60% of citizens. So if you can that’s one thing you can look into and see if that is your problem.

    Christine Budde, September 15, 2014 at 3:26 pm
  110. I have tbi from a motorcycle accident in 2008 and haven’t cried since, I even watched my dog get hit and killed by a car and couldn’t cry. I wish I could cry!

    Coni Wilson, September 17, 2014 at 4:43 am
  111. Hi,
    My mother in law doesnt seem to cry in the two years shes been living with us. Last year her mother (my hubbys granny) died. All of her siblings wept but she didnt though i can see how pained she is and how much she loved her mother. She even told her sister that she is crying too much… My mother in law once told me she cant cry even if she wanted to. What ive observed is that she likes things covered. Like an already covered bottle of soysauce she would cover it with a small plastic cup. Every bottle in the kitchen that is. Every entrance has a curtain. Even bookshelves. When i bought potato chips and left it on the dining table the morning after she put them in paper bags… She tries to cover everything even if they are already covered. She doesnt like eating out. Her doctors says shes depressed but she wont listen. And now shes complaining about neck pains. Im just glad she isnt suicidal and still goes to office. How can i help her. And plus i do want to see my house without a covered cover of everything. She is a nice person. I only hope she finds her happiness.

    DaughterinLaw, September 30, 2014 at 12:13 pm
  112. Ok that’s really sad

    Ally green, October 10, 2014 at 6:18 am
  113. I began feeling really cold when I’m about to cry and when I crying
    I feel like I’m having lumps in my throat
    I shiver …I get really cold

    Sanjna Akre, October 13, 2014 at 4:12 pm
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  115. i dont know why. nothing makes me cry. i have seen sad movies. none of them made me cry. i am 14. its been 8 months since i last cry.i really dont know why. i have not much feelings

    selva, October 20, 2014 at 8:20 am
  116. . I dont cry wen other people cry. Wen my Bf broke wit me, i didnt cry. Wen i read his message saying tat he Wanna breakup,i laughed seeing the message. I usually dont cry. Dont know y… Am i normal?? People ask me how u dont cry.. And i jst say i dont know. And i am jst 13 yrs old.

    Niya, November 3, 2014 at 10:49 am
  117. Hi I have been on trt since 2012 and since then I have cried once,and that was because the family pet pts but before starting it I was very emotional and suffered with depression alot.

    Joshua, November 11, 2014 at 10:15 pm
  118. Okay right, may I just say that I have never every cried in my entire life! It says in my baby book ‘does not produce tears’ can I say that effects me deeply as I have previously been unintentionally bullied. People have said ‘oh go cry me a river’ or i’d say ‘oh god I’m laughing so much I’m going to cry’ I’d be responded with ‘ha! But you can’t!’ I know these things seem petty and silly but it does affect me. I do not have PTSD or Depression but I still cannot produce tears. So, I decided to look up Familial Dysautonomia (Riley-day disorder) yet all I seem to find is websites including nostril concaving, jaws collapsing and upper lips flattening. So if anyone had any idea or knowledge on this please contact me, thank you.

    Leah, November 12, 2014 at 4:04 pm
  119. One of my who fell in love with me and I do the same fallen in love with him that never had chance to met each other because of the distance. It made my life sad. I can feel he really loves me the problem is only the distance. I’m hoping someday can find the way to see eachoother.

    Angela, November 25, 2014 at 8:51 pm
  120. I cannot cry. I lost my husband and recently my brother and I cannot shed a tear. I loved these men dearly, I get all choked up and get a heavy feeling in my chest but no tears. So much pain and no release, I need a good cry!!!!
    However, any hurt created or regarding my kids and grandkids and I cry like a baby. Why, oh why am I like this, I want to cry.

    Dette, November 30, 2014 at 7:28 pm
  121. I woke up this morning with the feeling of not being able to breath too easily and my fingers seem hard to control. I found this a bit scary and i began to cry. My eyes teared up and got blurry and yet… not a tear fell. I am very confused as to why this is going on, because it wasn’t a problem before.

    Sophia, January 10, 2015 at 3:45 pm
  122. For a long time I have lacked the ability to cry when showing strong emotion. Very rarely can I shed a tear in these negative times and the lacked ability to cry makes me feel so much worse. I still produce tears from wind, lack of sleep, or yawning. When I was a child I had to get surgery done on my tear ducts. What do you think my problem is. My depression eating me alive or my tear ducts closing up again after 16 years. I am 20 now just haven’t cried since I was 16.

    Logan Holt, January 31, 2015 at 1:58 pm
  123. I’m a girl and I have all the guts to do whatsoever, which is right; Once before I was able to control all my emotions either cry/laugh/make fun/ even in the extreme conditions where no tenagr like me can hold up emotions for so long. But now they r not in my contrl fully. Even I can’t share my emotions with anyone neither with my any parent/teachers/friends/classmates/relatives/sisters/brothers/my nani / no one. May b d reason behind this b the repetitive changes of school/friends/place/neighbours/teachers. But with reference 2 mmentioned above I have d courage to overcome evwn the most adverse situations of my life. I’ll handle all that nicely just n sm moments …………………….

    Jyoti, February 7, 2015 at 12:37 pm
  124. I should be able to cry bu. it’s been almost 3 yrs. now. I am 65 yrs,having difficulty finding employment,have to sell home of 20yrs. Live on social security. Unable to find an affordable place to move to, and have seeked all kinds of housing programs to no avail. So I do have reasons and the need to cry.

    Deb Johnson, March 4, 2015 at 3:49 pm
  125. Up until last year, crying was something normal for me. It helped me have some form of emotional release which I very much cherished and I am honestly very sad to have lost it. Be it happy tears, sad tears, or even tears of awe, I can’t seem to produce them anymore. Sometimes I get really close to crying, but then when I push them a little closer they just stop. I’ve had this same feeling of emotional tension ever since and it’s weighing down on other aspects of my life. People worry about me, and they have the right, because I haven’t been acting the same and it’s scary. Hopefully someday I’ll find a way to get back to the way I used to be but for now all I can do is keep trying.

    Jacob, April 1, 2015 at 12:27 am
  126. I also cant cry anymore, I used to cry a lot but now the tears just stopped coming out. Iam 22years and I want to be able to cry again. Its so depressing

    zyro, June 5, 2015 at 5:38 am
  127. Like many of these posts I would also like the ability to cry. I’ve never been Anke to shed tears when feeling low or sad or angry or even happy. I feel so abnormal when everyone ekes around me can turn on the waterworks at the first upset they have or hearing good news. I have so much emotion going through me. I feel so sorry for others who are misfortunate or sad or bereaved but can’t show my emotions. The last time I remember crying my heart out was 19 years ago when I lost my sister to Cancer. That was it I think.

    Martha, July 14, 2015 at 4:04 pm
  128. I’m 16, and my father died when I was 4, I was to young to understand what happened but than I didmt cry at all about it. Now as I get older and family starts to die, I’m still not crying. I’ll get the occasional teared eye from stubbing a toe or something like that , but when it comes to emotional pain, I’m just numb. I used to joke about being depressed when I was younger but now I think I’m actually depressed. I’ve had a hard time having never known my dad and having only shitty things saoidnabout him to me, he was a drug addict, a loser, he didn’t care about you. But I never got to know him, I feel like I have underlying causes of abandonment, because to this day I can’t bring myself to ever really put my 100% to anyone. I kind of prepare myself to lose people close to me at any given time, friends, family, I’m prepared for if they just leave or die or something. I’ve been feeling kind of isolated for awhile now, and I think its starting to show. I feel like I need some sort of guidance but I can’t bring myself to go to anyone because I always put on this solve your own problem attitude. And if I reach out ill be weak, and people won’t treat me the same. I don’t know what to do.

    Pete, July 15, 2015 at 4:51 am
  129. I was mentally and physically abused just about every single day by my mother and step-father for the first 15 years of my life,they used to beat me with belts and force me to stop crying with threats there would be more to come if I didn’t,I finally escaped the house of evil but have never been able to cry ever since and I am now aged 45,almost 30 years and not 1 single tear have I shed,I feel heartless.

    Lee, July 25, 2015 at 7:12 pm
  130. I have trouble crying about real things even when very upset and should be crying. I am depressed, maybe that has something to do with it? What’s weird is that when I watch something sad on TV or in the News I can cry. Why is this?

    Lori, August 10, 2015 at 8:12 pm
  131. I can’t cry… I just can’t. I’ve always found it hard to cry or feel emotion (in book scenes where everyone says that they bawled their eyes out, I didn’t even feel sad), but recently I’ve been finding myself unable to cry at all. The last time I remember crying was almost a year ago when my mum threatened to break my laptop. I have shed tears of eye irritation, but they weren’t even teardrops – just unformed tears that I would use to rub my eyes. I’ve never really worried about it, but I feel like crying often and it’s really bothersome that I physically CAN’T. No particular event has happened to trigger this. It just happened randomly, without any event to mark the occasion.

    Emerald, August 17, 2015 at 3:05 pm
  132. I’ve never cried in 30 years my eyes go watery and red that’s it, I get agitated tight chested and an overwhelming feeling. Just lost my mum and thought I should cry and I didn’t what’s wrong with me. I do have sjogrens.

    molly, September 15, 2015 at 8:40 am
  133. I had 3 family members die within a year from eachother and I cried only to one of them the rest I couldn’t cry to. My parents thought it was shock but its not. Currently after everything I’ve been through I’ve never been able to cry since. And I’m getting worried that I’ll never be able to again and it makes me sad. But again I still can’t cry.

    Jared, September 24, 2015 at 1:22 am
  134. It sounds like last night was anmizag. So neat to hear from the guys. I hope you all have a great final day at your mission sites!! We miss you and can’t wait to see you tomorrow!!Kim, Lilly and Lukey

    Kuck, October 15, 2015 at 3:29 am
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